Just bein' real.....

Sometimes I ask myself "WHY am I SO real on this blog?". Most of the people who read this blog are complete strangers and yet I offer up my deepest thoughts! Anyhoo, it is what it is and I suppose it will always be that way. I can NOT believe that I am about to share this on my blog! What in "tarnation" is wrong with me!? Well, yesterday I got a second opinion, from a plastic surgeon, about getting a breast reduction. The few people, I told that I was considering it, all told me that I did not "need" one...as their eyes diverted to my DD chest! (All but Tanya...she was very supportive...NO pun intended!). I asked my doctor about it last month, and she seemed to think it could relieve some of my headaches, neck pain and upper back pain-so she referred me out to a plastic surgeon. The first one that I saw seemed "nice enough" but he was primarily a "hand surgeon". When I asked him how many breast reductions he had done he said between 12-24! I could not help but wonder if that meant 12, and since he did the surgery on both breast he doubled it to 24! I did not feel comfortable with that number, so I kept searching. Yesterday I ended up at the same USF office that my neurosurgeon is at. I have a MUCH better feeling about the surgeons that I met there! So, now it is a waiting game.....the insurance will have to approve it, if they do then it will be 100% covered! Now...here is the problem that I have...I have been wanting a "tummy tuck" for years! Ever since I lost 92 lbs I have been left with lots of saggy skin in my belly and it REALLY bothers me. I am ashamed of it and I feel like I have this "dark secret" that I am hiding! Most people can not imagine what I am talking about.....they see me and think that it must be about being "skinny". It is NOT a skinny issue. I honestly feel like I have a deformity that I have been hiding for years! The few people who HAVE seen my "secret" all agree and can understand my desperation! Anyhoo, I thought that while I was at the plastic surgery office, I'd get an estimate on getting a "tummy tuck" too. I get REALLY ill from anesthesia, so if I could get them both done at the same time then it would save me from having to go back "under" again. A few years ago I got estimates (from 2 docs) and to get both a breast lift and tummy tuck it was going to be $17,000! Well, now, since my insurance will be paying for the breast reduction and the breast lift, it would "only" cost me about $6,000 to get the tummy tuck. Well, I do not HAVE $6,000......YET! I am racking my brain trying to come up with a way that I can make that kind of money! Tanya says "where there is a WILL...there is a WAY!". The WILL is there...I just have to find a WAY. I know that I run the risk of sounding "vain"...which is one reason that I hesitated on being so REAL on this issue, I even considered taking a picture of my belly and posting it-just so you'd know that it is not a vanity issue. ( but, knowing some of the people who read this blog would be seeing my bare belly was just unbareable for me!) It truly effects how I view myself, it is like a "foreign" body part that I live with and can feel 24 hours a day! Anyhoo-Brett has told me that I should post a video of one of my coupon classes and charge people to view it (he's been telling me that for months!). Does anyone "out there" know how that can be done? OR...does anyone have any creative ideas that can help me come up with this money? PLEASE let me know if you have any ideas that will help me. Please try to understand my "heart" on the matter. And, if you have gotten any help through this blog, and you have learned how to save your family money and you have the "extra" to give.....there is a pay pal "donate" button...feel free to use it :) . I figured that even if every person gave just $2.00-within one month I could have most of it paid for! Honestly, I really do not expect my readers to donate..I KNOW that times are tough...I know what it is like to have even have $2.00 to give, I also know the "anger" that people may have towards me for me even wanting a "TT", but unless you know me and have seen my body-please do not judge me too harshly..I just thought that I would "put it out there".