Nerves

Last night it took me FOREVER to go to sleep! Once I went to sleep, I kept waking up with "night sweats". I think that it is from nerves. I have been more nervous about my doctor's appt this morning than I was about the actual surgery! I think it may be because I now KNOW how bad the surgery actually is. I thought I knew before how bad it would be........but my expectations were not even close to reality. I was warned that if I do not "fuse" then the surgery will have to be done again. I have been doing everything, in my power, to try to get those bones growing-the rest is up to God! They expect to see at least some growth today-it will take around a year (sometimes more) to fuse completely, but we should see progress with each x ray. Even if they do not see growth today, they'll give it a couple more months before they make any plans for surgery. I am SOOOOOOO glad that Karen is taking me today-I do not want to be alone at this appt. If they see growth, I want someone to celebrate with me, and if they do not, I want a shoulder to cry on! Karen will be here around 9:00-we will be driving to Tampa to the USF neurosurgeon's office. After my appt. we are going to lunch together and then back to my house. She is going to stay with me today and make her "covered dish" for the PJ party (GNO) here. It is going to be nice to be able to just hang out this afternoon! Then tonight, we are going to Tanya's for GNO-we are just relaxing in our pjs and watching a funny video that Tanya picked up from MOPS. I am so thankful that Karen is taking her DAY OFF and spending it helping me! Also, I am proud to have friends that did not just leave me behind for GNO this month but instead, they planned it so I would be able to come and enjoy it too! I am gonna bring my camera tonight-it is sure to be a blast! I will update my blog with the GOOD REPORT I will be getting today!!!